Reading up on my last few blogs, one might think that God failed us, in that we DID in fact have the dreaded surgery. I'm here to say, HE DID NOT!. And He does not need this feeble human to explain His part in this, but I will attempt anyway for MY peace of mind.
When Wayne's heart rate was racing constantly 24/7, it wore him out. After 5+ weeks of this, we prayed for God to slow it down(which we firmly believe He did, as it has not raced since). Where we went wrong in our thinking, is thinking that would cure all. HA! The flutters caused the high heart rate. So, even though the flutters were still happening, Wayne was able to function, (not to normal capacity),to the point he was tempted to cancel the surgery. Thank God, we didn't, b/c he started a-fibbing and/or fluttering again. (to the drs. there's a difference in the two, to Wayne, there IS no difference) I might add here that his heart rate stayed normal during this time, thank you Jesus. Maybe God slowed the rate until we could have the surgery knowing he needed it. I don't pretend to know the mind of God, our job is to trust Him and we will do just that. I do know He was with us thru it all and HE will never leave us or forsake us. If we had canceled, we would be waiting right now for another date in which to have the procedure done again. One might say, "well dummy, why didn't you ask for God to just heal it all, if He can do it". That's an legitimate question. Don't know the answer though. We do ask God for wisdom in making decisions, so maybe He had a part in that as well.
It was a huge blessing to have all our children there waiting with me. Wayne went into surgery knowing all the children would be there. And as he came out at the end of the day, even though feeling much pain and discomfort, he was blessed to see his children. We had Alex and Maya all day too, and they were great to be able to stick it out for such a long time. They both finally fell asleep after the long day at the hospital. They neither one was as happy to see Wayne as Wayne was to see them, but the next evening at home, they were both normal to him. My faithful friend Kathy was also there with me. Wayne's sister, Cherry, wanted to be there, as she has been there for the other surgeries, but couldn't make it this time. She was there in spirit though, I know!!
As for Wayne's outcome in this surgery, it goes as follows:
I now have the bionic man living with me, as the pacemaker is running his whole heart.
It controls his heart rate no matter what the flutters are doing.
After healing, he probably will not feel the flutters, and will lead a normal life.
Of course, we might have to redefine normal, but maybe not, as we have heard stories of others living normal. We will expect the same.
I hope to write again saying how good he feels and is back to normal.
Until then.........
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