Saturday, November 27, 2010

Thanksgiving

Had an unusual Thanksgiving this year. As it turned out, I had my cake and ate it, too.

It started with meeting a friend from childhood and his wife for lunch, in Shreveport on my way to Monroe. I had such a good time visiting them, then continued my journey to West Monroe. The yard at my parents home looked great and a sweaty dad greeting me at the door told me who was responsible for it. We watched an old movie with Paul Newman playing Billy the Kid. Never knew he made that movie. The next morning was spent getting ready for Thanksgiving dinner, to be done and cleaned up by the time the Saints game came on. Mission accomplished!!! Debbie and Ralph joined us in eating, but left in time to see the game at home. (I think maybe he throws things at the tv or something, ha!)

Well the game begins with a bang!!! My dad is calm and collected, laying on the couch watching the game. Not realizing it at first, I was scaring my mom as I yelled or jumped for joy or frustration. I attempted to tone it down, not sure I was successful. Towards the end of the game, my niece and her family dropped by to visit, so I wasn't the only loud one then. ha!

The next morning.... NO!!! not at 3a.m. At 11a.m. my mom and I checked out the Stage store (Beall's). I should get them for false advertisement. They displayed cute shirts looking fitted (somewhat). When we saw them, they were huge!! I don't need to look bigger!!!! Moving on... dropped by the grocery store before picking up a pizza from Johnny's Pizza. Came home, devoured it and got on the road back to Conroe with the remaining pizza in my possession. Consumed today.

I drove straight to Mark's, joining all to eat out. It was quite interesting and fun. We actually got a table fitting all 10 of us. (Wayne was working) Beka had bought this book that day giving everyone's personality. Funny, how it described us pretty accurate. We even read what Phoenix would be like when he grew up. Italian food was great, but huge amount, so I boxed mine up for the hubby to eat at work. Visited with the kids and grandkids a bit at Mark and Lisa's, then took Wayne his food out at work. Hot bath next, then play catchup on fb and emails.

Mid-morning, I dropped by Mark's again to visit with kiddos. Matthew and Ashleigh and kids stayed with Mark, this trip. Maybe 'cause I wasn't at my house, but I'm betting it's b/c Maya loves playing with Alex and for the most part they play very well together.
Before heading back to Austin, they came up to visit with Wayne as he was awake to eat lunch and then back to sleep. Maya loves to swing in the front yard, so I pushed her til my arms were about to drop off. She wanted me to swing and go under her. I don't do "under", so got Matthew out to do that trick. She also needed to watch one Caillou and one Angelina Ballerina. Phoenix is obsessed with Wayne. It's really precious to watch. The other grandkids have always favored me (I think b/c I play with them),but Phoenix has made his decision and he's sticking to it. It's cute. Today, he even favored Wayne over his parents. Crazy!! b/c one of them has ta tas. ha! Phoenix finally gave Wayne permission to go back to bed, and Mary Ann and I headed over to Margarita's, with the Austin bound group, to eat lunch as they headed home. I fed Phoenix as they ate lunch. So, they headed back to Austin. Maya knows it's 2 Chipmunk movies to get home. She never tires of the Chipmunks!!I hope Phoenix slept the WHOLE way, as he hates riding in the dark and lets you know he clearly does not like it!

I think that officially ends the Thanksgiving break, although there is still Sunday to go. Tomorrow should be uneventful, unless I feel the sudden urge to speak out again! Yes, I'm up to sing again!!! With a mike!!!! I think I'll be ok, I think I learned my lesson last Sunday.

This was probably boring, but I'm labeling it for my own benefit. I want to remember these good times.

Monday, November 22, 2010

Embarrassing Times

Ok, so I realize that some of my blogs are sad, mainly because that seems to be when I need to express myself. Maybe to ease the pain. Well this blog is about a couple of funny times.

The first one is on me. I was up for Worship Team, yesterday. So there I am, standing there after our opening song, listening to our pastor give his greeting, and telling us he would like us to express what we were especially thankful for this year. (it being Thanksgiving week) He was giving us a minute to think. At least this is what I thought he said. Listening to the silence, already feeling gratitude for having a friend like Kathy Fuller for 30 years, I said (while standing up on stage) "I'm thankful for a 30 yr. friendship with Kathy Fuller." Well 1st of all, I started to speak just as the pastor was about to say something else, but he looked back at me and said "yes, Libby?" And I said my piece, and he said thank you or something like that, and continued with his thought. Well, OBVIOUSLY, that wasn't the time he had for us to speak out, b/c he directed us to greet one another and dismissed children for Sonshine Kids. And 2nd, I should know better than speaking out, it seems it's always wrong wording or timing.
During meet and greet, I went down to him to apologize for speaking out, and explaining I must have heard him wrong. OBVIOUSLY!!! He set me at ease and said that's ok and that was for later. (I think) Really wished I could have disappeared, but the morning had just begun. Not only did I speak at the wrong time, I REALLY must have heard wrong, b/c it never happened.
Thru the whole service,there was never a time for such as I thought.
WELL WHAT DID I NOT HEAR, THAT OTHERS HEARD???? Because no one else spoke up, and I thought no one was going to say anything, so I thought I would get it started.
It was a good laugh for Mary Ann and me as I told her that night. I'm sure she's pretty glad she doesn't go to church with me. I can just hear her cracking up right there in the service with her loud laugh!! She can't help it, it just comes out. Then I would have surely melted where I stood!!

Now let's backtrack to last year at the "Walk Thru Bethlehem" at our church. Kathy, Mary Ann and I went thru it, without a hitch....UNTIL...we got to the manger scene. There was a point in time, we were to lay our gift down on the steps of the manger. (gifts..little stars, were given to us at some point in our walk) The group we were in had about 10-15 people in it. we took turns laying the gift down for the Baby Jesus. When it came time for us 3.. Mary Ann and I laid ours down, then Kathy.

First, I'd like to warn you for what happened next, b/c WE did not get a warning. And let me also say, this could have EASILY happened to me. Now Kathy would not want me to tell this to a big group of people but I think she'd be ok with the few people who read my blog. And she can't be embarrassed anymore, right? It's been a year since this happened, and I burst out laughing just thinking about it.

Have you ever been in a situation where you got very tickled about something, and just can't quit laughing?? The harder you try to quit, the worse it gets. And then you also are laughing at each other being tickled. Now you can't say I didn't warn you and probably it won't be funny to you. I guess you just had to be there. Ok here goes:

Kathy bent over to lay her gift on the step, and passed gas as she did. We don't know who all heard it, but the expression on her face told it all. Mary Ann was doing a little snicker, and thank God she didn't let the loud cackle out. Wonder how she did that?? Kathy came back to her place, snickering. I asked Mary Ann what they were laughing about and she told me. Well, it was all I could do to not cackle out. This started a marathon of laughter from all 3 of us. Wouldn't have been so bad, but the timing again was wrong. This was the ending of the walk where they get serious about presenting the gospel and praying. I don't know about Kathy, but I was wetting my pants, from laughing so hard. The leaders were probably put out with us, but we had no control. We kept trying to stop, but it just didn't happen. They finally opened the double doors and we bypassed the refreshments and went straight to the restroom, finally getting some composure, but not much. Just enough to stay dry.

I know it was wrong, but hey, Kathy made me do it!!! That's one thing I loved about Kathy, she was real, not judgmental and yes, she was human!! That night certainly proved it in many ways.

I will miss my friend this holiday season, and will cackle out when thinking of this night. I don't think I should go to the "Walk Thru Bethlehem" this year. Do you?? Yeah, better not.

Labeling as only I can see it!

Thursday, November 11, 2010

Thanksgiving Tug!! No it's Settled

As I write this, Mary Ann is watching a football game on tv that I have no interest in at all, but she's scaring the crap out of me, yelling and screaming all sorts of things. I won't repeat, not sure how to spell them.

Ok, all my family will be in town for Thanksgiving, except one---me. I'm going to spend it with my parents. Don't like the idea of them being by themselves on Thanksgiving. Although, it doesn't seem to bother them in the least. Last time, they were here, Maya was a tiny baby, 4 years ago. I think that's the last trip they took.

The tug is... my son-- Matthew, Ashleigh and their 2 kiddos will be here. Now, if I can entice them to stay thru Saturday, I may can have my turkey and kiddos too. It's just that, I have many times to look forward to spend time with my grandchildren. My parents are 83 and 86. My time is limited with them. Surely my kids will understand. Wayne will be working nights anyway, and hopefully the kids will take a plate out to him.

I'm excited to watch the Saints play Thanksgiving Day with my dad. Last time, I watched with him, they lost. (right before Christmas)

So I will make broccoli rice casserole, enough to send to Mark and Lisa's and to take to my parents. So ok, it's settled and it's labeled as such.

Saturday, November 6, 2010

A Good Day

Today, started off great. Wayne and I woke up at 8 and it felt good to have such a good night's sleep. I got ready, went to a memorial service Odyssey Hospice was hosting for the patients who had passed in the last year, at Forest Park Funeral home. I met Roy, Karla, Kayli, Tiffany and Sherri there. Bill and Sharon Preston was also there to honor Shelly, their daughter.

It was started off with prayer and a soloist sing Amazing Grace. Then a story was told about a set of twins talking in the womb at conception. (I'll try and get that story and post it, it was too good to wing it) A month before, they had asked for a picture of our loved one. With that they played a beautiful song while a dvd was played of our loved ones. Next came the calling out the names of our loved ones. When our loved one was called, family and friends were to stand up and remain standing til all had been called. We all read scriptures from Psalm. At some point someone else read a poem about letting go.

To end the service a bagpiper entered the chapel playing as he was walking up the aisle up to the front and then back down the aisle with all of us filing out behind him. The musician was wonderful at his talent, but I must say, I already hear with one ear. It was extremely loud and shrill.

He led us outside where he stopped playing, to gather around to watch them release 10 - 15 white doves. This was by far the icing on the cake. I had never seen this done before. Just as they told us.... after being released, some lagging behind, they grouped back together in the air, forming a V, circling the area a few times performing like the "Blue Angels". We were told they were getting their bearing so as to fly back home. They likened it to us letting our loved ones go to return home to our Lord and Savior. It was something to watch as we peeked thru the trees watching their graceful show. Thank you God, for giving me the visual.

Afterwards, we went back inside for refreshments and to visit with the hospice members. I had grown to really love one of the nurses tending to Kathy while she was in the hospice house. I could tell she really loved what she was doing. I was able to visit with her and discuss becoming a volunteer for them in some way.

I gotta tell ya, though.....Seeing the picture of Kathy on the screen, knowing it was taken just a month before she died, STILL sends me in a spin. It happened so fast, we knew we were losing her, we didn't know it would be so fast. I still find myself about to call her or expecting to attend some function with her. We always went together.

It was a good day, and I'm labeling as I see it.

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Not a Soap Opera..It's the Real Deal!!

Off and on all my adult life, I have kept up in someway with a couple of soap operas that were around when I was just a preschooler. They have finally been done away with. It's bittersweet, for I enjoyed the chilling out time, but I knew in my innermost being, I needed to be obsessed with something more worthy of my time. I mean, it really is just a bunch of slut stuff going on, to be quite honest. I rationalized it by saying only a stable person who cannot be swayed into the fantasy life should be allowed to watch (meaning no children under 18 yrs. of age). I would in the old days record them on the vcr and of course now the dvr. Isn't technology great! After cleaning houses all day or late at night while Wayne was working, I could settle into an hour and a half of uninterrupted unrealistic world of soaps. Well, that era of my life has passed and even though I don't have a specific chilling out time, I'm glad it's over.

The real love story is a true story as told from the eyes of the witness..me!

I'm part of a group who goes to an assisted living home every Sunday afternoon to serve the residents ice cream and sing hymns and praise songs with them. This particular day, I was making my way around, as someone else was leading the music. I sat to visit and sing with a sweet lady named Dolly. I asked her what had happened to put her husband, Bob in the hospital. She proceeded to tell me the story and stressed he had been there 3 weeks and she wanted to see him so bad. I asked, "you haven't seen Bob in 3 weeks? Could you if you had a ride?" She said yes she could but had been unsuccessful of getting a ride. I told her I would pick her up at 9a.m. Monday. She was elated!!! It doesn't take much to make someone's day. I was on my way there the next morning and a thought came to mind... I might not be able to get her in my truck. Sure enough, I got to her apartment, helped her dress and realized she was totally dependent on the wheel chair and could barely stand up and even then not by herself. When I asked what kind of help I could expect from the aids, the aid was confident they could help me, but was concerned about the help on the other end of the ride. I understood completely. This of course upset Dolly and was now very tearful thinking she came so close to seeing her life-love. Things clicked in my head (finally). I told them I'd be back in 30 minutes driving a toyota corolla (my daughter's car).

I'm back with the little car......let the fun begin!!! I lifted her to her feet, holding her up as she shuffled her feet around so as to have a seat in the car. Swung her feet around, seatbelted her, shoved the wheelchair in the backseat and we were off!!!
Got to our destination and reversed the procedure and up the elevator we went. We wheeled into his room and caught him sleeping. Took him awhile I think to realize he wasn't dreaming.
They had him sitting up part way in a hospital type recliner with no weight bearing down on his legs. I quickly shoved the bed over as far as I could and wheeled her right up next to him so they could hold hands. (fyi...anytime you see this couple they would be holding hands)

I went out for a few minutes to make some phone calls, to give them a bit of privacy. I didn't stay out long, just in case I was needed, I sat in the corner of the room. There I listened to the sweetest sounds to my ears in quite sometime. 'I love you'; 'I love you too'; I'I think about you all day and all night'; 'cry when I go to bed'; 'why do you cry?'; 'well, I cry because I love you, I cry b/c I miss you, I cry b/c I worry about you, I cry b/c I want you home with me, I cry b/c I'm lonely, that's why I cry'; 'Don't cry, don't worry, I will be home to hold you tight, soon'; 'you should have seen the our little squirrel outside our window, this morning, he kept trying to climb the pole to the feeder and sliding down, jumping to climb and sliding down again,ha!ha!; 'ha,ha, ha, ha, ha,!!!

I can't possibly go on as she did. She's like the everready bunny, she can go on and on and on. Just one story after another and he just looked into her eyes and listened to every word she spoke as the smile on his face clearly stated how much he loves her. They laughed together and she continued telling her stories. At different times, telling one another 'I love you'; 'I love you MORE'; 'how do you know that, b/c I love you the most ever'.

Towards the end of the visit, she told him she was going to stand up and if he would lean over in the chair towards the edge, she'd give him a kiss. That's when I came out from the corner. Got in front of her, on the count of 3 lifted her up and held her while they gave one another kiss after kiss. I was so amazed at their affection for one another, I totally forgot I was pretty much right in the middle of it. Then it felt weird. Just for a moment though, b/c I had been a part of something so sweet and so tender, it was worth it all.

The doctor's nurse came in all cheerful and said he was the highlight of her rounds. He always has a smile and a cheerful spirit. She asked him who his visitors were. He began to introduce us...'this is my wife, the love of my life' and as he continued he began the "cry face". You know, when we first start to cry but we try not to. Yeah, that's the one..he continued to describe Dolly and had to stop. The nurse said don't get all sad, you have visitors, be happy. I said to her...'The only time they cry is when they talk of one another. It's tears of happiness."

Well, after 2 1/2 hours, I thought we should leave, so we commenced to making our way back to Hearthstone Assisted Living. They told their goodbyes and hopes of seeing each other again, soon.

I was the one BLESSED that morning!!! You would think this couple were newlyweds, but they've been married 63 years. And I'm going to guess they have been mostly happy years. They speak to one another as if they are reading loveletters. Do people still write those things??

It's me labeling it as I see it.


Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Mini-Meltdown

So... we started our Bible Study group back up last Tuesday. Last week, we learned a little about one another as our leader, Barbara stood by each one and told how she was connected with us. Most of us knew one another, but there were new faces among us. There were 30 women present, so you can imagine how long it took, but enjoyable. Needless to say, didn't have time for the intro to the book of Acts. Took care of the announcements and had a time of prayer. If you're looking for a good Bible Study, this is it. Barbara is an excellent teacher. It's sponsored by the YMCA, but we outgrew their facility. We were graciously invited to have it at one of our local churches. We've started our 4th year there.

Today was the 2nd day. While all along, trying to go about the business of helping out, for me, there's been this elephant in the room. I haven't spoken of it and neither has anyone else. I don't know if anyone else has noticed it. We go about our business as if it doesn't exist. To get weak in the knees and speak of it would initiate a flood of tears pouring out of me. I didn't want that. Just kept telling myself-- do as Kathy would do-- go on about the business of the Lord. AND SMILE!!! She's in a better place, she wouldn't come back if she could, she's not sick anymore, she's with us in spirit, she wouldn't want me to be sad. WELL THAT"S TOUGH!!! Because I AM sad, and I'm TIRED of smiling, while crying inside. And doggoneit! I miss her. I talked to her almost everyday. I might not see her all week, but I'd see her Sunday morning at church, and again at Bible Study. I'd see her smiling face, even when she was in pain. We'd save one another a place to sit. Do you remember being little girls and holding hands and giggling with your best friend?? Ya might say we were joined at the hip! Well, I must need a hip replacement now, because things just don't feel right. I must learn to walk by myself.

So, back to today....I guess I had stuffed these feelings down, but it's not like I haven't grieved for her AND cried!! It just hit me bad today, kind of by surprise. I thought I was finished grieving. I guess that's the way it is, some little something will trigger the emotion deep within. I have felt a sadness off and on, but today was different, and the floodgates were knocked down by the river of tears swelled up inside. Didn't know I had any tears left. One friend told me "I knew this was going to happen, I just didn't know when." And she knows from whence she speaks.

Now as I've said before, in another blog right after Kathy passed on...... I'm ok. I just give my feelings a voice. Maybe, I should have written sooner; might would have prevented the meltdown. Who knows??? It is what it is!! And I am who I am. And she is where she is.

Be my thoughts, be my words, just your love and grace be heard
be the actions, that I take,be expressions that I make.
be the very breath I breathe, be the life that flows thru me,
every moment of this day, O Lord I pray.

Just me, labeling as I see it.

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Divine Appointments, Gotta Love 'em

I have a sweet hairdresser. I can't do much with my hair because my arms get tired, so I go once a week for her to blow dry. It will keep for a week sleeping in a ponytail curled up. It's worth it to let her do it. She usually does it on Saturdays to have it fresh for church. I wash it and come to her wet at her convenience. Or IS it?? No sometimes she goes out of her way to accommodate my schedule.
For instance today.... I told her last Friday I would like to come in today, because I was going to visit my grandson. I usually call her the day of and see when it's best to come in. It only takes 15 minutes tops to do my hair. That is, if we could shut up!! Ha! Anyway, back to the story, so when I called her today, she had forgotten and had planned a 1/2 day off. Well, she went and had her time off and called me later to meet her at the shop. We ended up in a very serious talk about my last blog. Did I mention this sweetheart is a believer?? I explained to her all of these different options swimming around in my head. She was able to objectively see things a bit clearer than me. In the end I decided it was not my dilemma. It belonged to the family who was wounded, although, I was hurt, no actually WE were SHOCKED!! I will encourage them to confront the matter and will support them bodily and verbally.

There was a reason my hairdresser was not swamped with clients like she normally is. She had a divine appointment (with me). I'm so glad she chose to keep it. And what goes on in her shop, stays in her shop. Thank you my friend.

Well, I'm off to see my grandson, Jeremy for a few days. Unless God closes the door on my decision, we will address this next week, possibly.

Father God, thank you for putting things in place in your timing. Prepare the hearts of all involved and may you be at the very CENTER of it.

I see no other way to label this.