Show me the Money

Money is tight. So, I've been doing what I believe, which is trusting God with our finances. All my teachings and beliefs say--trust God, trust God. As most of you know, that's easier said than done. In desperation, I say to myself and God-"show me the money". No disrespect intended. I've been in prayer and have had my thinking cap on to come up with a way of bringing in more income. Something I could do and still be available to Wayne and my grandchildren, would be nice. Can't have it both ways, I thought. Nothing really coming to mind, I continue to press on and trust God.
The last week in January, my elderly neighbor was admitted to the hospital for a few days. When released, his children was concerned about leaving their mother alone with the father (who has dementia). They compromised with their mother by having her promise to get someone to come about 4 hours a day as an extra observer and helper.
I noticed they were home from the hospital so I walked NEXT DOOR to see how things were. Mind you, I don't make a practice of this. I feel they need their privacy when first getting home. Two of the children were out on the drive and told me to go on in the house. I happened to be there earlier in the week when they were taking him to the hospital. I guess my reason, was to follow up on THAT visit. God had another reason.
I sat down and listened to the drama that unfolded during the week at the hospital. She began to tell me of this help she was going to need. As she was talking, I slowly and meekly raised my hand so as to say-- consider me. She jumped at the chance and said her prayers had been answered!! I told her I had been praying and it was an answer to MY prayers also.
Her children came in and we hashed out the details. They were relieved to have someone they could trust with their parents AND I was next door. They pay me $10 an hour. I could just sit there, but I can't justify that. So, each day I find something to clean as well as keep an eye on Lewis. It seems the whole problem stemmed from a mix up with the meds he's taking. I keep an eye on that too.
I just received my 4th paycheck. There's been no gas usage, no new clothes required and I'm next door for Wayne if he needs me. I'm done early enough to get Alex from school if needed and to get Wayne off to work in the afternoon.

I continue to be amazed! I don't know why. God ALWAYS does what he says he will do.

TO GOD BE THE GLORY!!

My Parents & my Hubby

I saw my parents this past weekend, to celebrate my mom turning 82. Also did some more of that attic cleaning job. I miss my parents something fierce!! I know,-- I AM grateful they are still on this side of the dirt. A sadness comes over me when I'm traveling back home until about Shreveport. I wish we lived closer to them, so I could visit every week. An awareness has come over me that came over Wayne years ago. WE are THEM now!! We are to be there for our kids and their children, now, but I still have them and want to enjoy the time I have left with them. And I think I am but I'm just not through being a daughter yet. It really pains me to think of losing them. I know, you who have already lost your parents are saying "shut Up!! at least your parents are still alive!!" I guess the anticipation of losing them overwhelms me sometimes. They are in good health, as far as organs go. They do have a lot of pain and disabilities.

Anyway, I'm just venting with a glass of wine, all by my lonesome. Wayne's at work and Mary Ann is somewhere with friends.

I'm so grateful for my parents and my children and OF COURSE my hubby by whom the children would not be. He is so much a part of my past, present and future. He has been in my life all but 15 years of my life. I just feel I'm at a place in life I want to be 2 places at once.

We had Valentines day while we were in Monroe. We both have the memory of our 1st Valentines day branded in our brains.
We had met 4 days before. He was our ride to this teenage nightclub for me and my 3 friends. His friend was the brother to one of the girls I was with. Found out later the guys had already picked us out as we were coming to the car from the house. They ended up later at the club. He asked me to dance and then we talked, then he asked me out for the next weekend. I said yes. During the week came Valentine's day. In pouring down rain, he showed up at my door after school with a valentine's card. He was soaked. I couldn't ask him in b/c my parents weren't there. The card let me know he was smittened with me. It swept me off my feet. Our date was 3 days later. When he brought me home that night, he saw me to my door (past my curfew I might add, and never got in trouble for it)and handed me my first love note from him (if you don't count the valentine card). Now that REALLY swept me off my feet. He basically poured his heart out to me.

Ok, the wine is gone and that's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Obama Begins--hmmm- with a hint of Bushism

Obama begins - and so does the resurrection of Bush
Larry Elder - Syndicated Columnist - 1/22/2009 8:40:00 AM
This week, Barack Obama became the 44th president of the United States. So now the governing begins -- along with the resurrection of George W. Bush's reputation.

Candidate Obama promised to pull all the troops from Iraq within the first year to 16 months of his administration. President Obama intends to retain Bush's secretary of Defense, Robert Gates -- a man who supported Bush's courageous decision to "surge" and send 30,000 troops, an action that then-Sen. Obama opposed while predicting its failure. When, post-surge, violence in Iraq dramatically declined, candidate Obama refused -- for a long time -- to credit the surge, later pointing to the lack of Iraqi "political reconciliation." But the supposedly nonexistent political reconciliation produced a U.S.-Iraqi agreement -- supported by Gates -- for troops to remain until 2011.

Candidate Obama claimed George W. Bush "shredded" the Constitution. But as president-elect, Obama nominated former Deputy Attorney General Eric Holder to serve as attorney general. Holder, in a 2002 CNN interview, agreed with the Bush administration's position that the Geneva Conventions do not apply to terrorist detainees! "One of the things we clearly want to do with these prisoners," said Holder, "is to have an ability to interrogate them and find out what their future plans might be, where other cells are located....It seems to me that given the way in which they have conducted themselves, however, that they are not, in fact, people entitled to the protection of the Geneva Convention. They are not prisoners of war."

Holder also supported the Patriot Act, first passed in the Senate 98-1. The Senate renewed it in 2006 with support from then-Sens. Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama. Both versions included the much-condemned "library provisions," which allow federal agents -- after authorization from a "secret" court -- to obtain suspects' records from businesses, libraries, and bookstores during terrorism probes.

Two months ago, the United States Court of Appeals for the 2nd Circuit ruled unanimously in support of legal warrantless searches of Americans overseas. "The Fourth Amendment's requirement of reasonableness -- but not the Warrant Clause -- applies to extraterritorial searches and seizures of U.S. citizens," wrote the judges. The panel of judges justified "sustained and intense monitoring" as reasonable, given the "self-evident need to investigate threats to national security."

Candidate Obama promised to shut down Guantanamo Bay immediately, and the new President recently reiterated his intention. But the closure may take some time -- possibly a year -- as the administration faces the reality of what to do with the estimated 245 detainees, many of whom represent serious threats. Countries claiming "abuses" at Gitmo refuse to take any of the detainees, including those from their own countries.

Between 30 and 60 of Gitmo's detainees, according to the Bush administration, returned to the battlefield upon their release. When Obama closes Gitmo, what about the "rights" of detainees held in prisons in Afghanistan? As the new administration works through these issues, Bush's choices won't seem so arbitrary, for they were good-faith decisions made in gray areas -- with the goal of keeping the country safe.

Candidate Obama criticized the Bush administration for "neglecting" the "peace process" between the Israelis and the Palestinians. The world now condemns Israel for its "disproportionate" military action in Gaza. But back during the 2006 parliamentary election in Gaza, one of Hamas' candidates was a woman named Miriam Farahat. Palestinians call her Umm Nidal, Mother of the Struggle, for she lost three sons in campaigns to murder Israelis. A Hamas recruitment video features Farahat showing her 17-year-old son how to kill Israelis and telling him not to come back. He murdered five Jewish students. Another son was killed when the Israeli air force blew up his vehicle, which was carrying Qassam rockets. Farahat celebrated his death: "I am so proud. I wish I had more sons to offer." The Palestinians elected her. President Obama will soon arrive at the same position as did Bush -- that would-be "peace partner" Hamas seeks, above all, Israel's "obliteration."

Obama promised -- before larding it up with conditions -- to sit down without preconditions with Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad. Last year, the United Nations Security Council imposed sanctions on Iran's military and most of its banks for continued nuclear activity. Ahmadinejad calls for Israel's destruction. Iran arms and assists both the Shiite Hezbollah and the Sunni Hamas. Obama will come to regret that "cowboy" Bush did not do more to prevent Iran from acquiring a nuke, even though Vice President Joe Biden once threatened the impeachment of President Bush had he taken military action.

Many historians long ago called the Bush administration a failure. President Obama's actions suggest that he now holds a different view, if only privately.

CREATORS SYNDICATE COPYRIGHT 2008 LAURENCE A. ELDER

I'm just saying-------

A Grateful Heart

People always told me how great it was to have grandchildren. They were wrong. Anything I ever heard cannot hold a candle to how great it truly is. A feeling I was very receptive to, but surprised all the same. A blog on that at a later date.Another feeling that has surprised me is my love for my parents. I love my parents as much as I ever have, but it's different than before. I'm not even sure when the feeling took place, I just want to give it a voice now. So many times we wait til we lose someone we love before we really know what they mean to us. Well, I have had a revelation on the subject and needed to jot it down while it's fresh on my mind. (these days thoughts don't stay on my mind long) lolI have always looked to my parents for protection and security and support. It has occurred to me-I don't see them in that way anymore. Instead, I feel protective over them. I find myself attempting to be supportive and encouraging to them in their own struggle for normal in their aging years. Things I would have told them in the past, I keep to myself. My dad has always been a worrier for us girls and our families. I don't want to burden him. He just can't help himself--it's in his blood.The gratitude I have for the life they gave us girls is overwhelming. I only wish I could do more for them. On cards I send I try to write about a fond memory I have from growing up. All they really care about is spending time with us. My resolution for the new year, now that Wayne is feeling better is to visit more often. In the past, we would visit once a month, but it was always a very short visit, b/c Wayne would need to get back to our business. In the past, they would visit, but now they hardly travel at all.I feel so fortunate to still have my parents living. I want to take every opportunity to see them often. If you think about it, there is an age you think of yourself still being. And if you don't, then you're too young. You haven't arrived yet, so enjoy the ride as long as you can. Anyway, back to what I was saying.... Did you know that you still think of that age as you get older. I asked my mom a few years back and she agreed. You never feel as old as you really are. Sometimes to the point there is a stranger in the mirror looking back at you. She might look like your mother. I've been told all my life I look like my mom. I was told that just these past holidays. My sister and I are trying to empty out our parents attic. They don't need to be up there at all for any reason. We've ran into some great memories up there. I caught myself telling my Mom--Dad should carry the cell phone with him when he's outside doing stuff, in case he should fall--- Her reply was---your sister has already had that conversation with him. It's not what you know, it's what you do with what you know.---- How true THAT is. I enjoy watching football games, Wheel of Fortune, and any western that's on with them. My mom and I flip thru magazines together and watch HGTV and Food Network channels after Daddy goes to bed. When I'm there, I feel like someone's daughter again, but now it's a grown up daughter. I haven't always felt that way. I'm pushing 57, it's about time. I'll have to watch it with my own kids and remember they are all grown up now. That's a hard one to swallow. It's like a vitamin you need to take everyday. No matter how old we get--we're still someone's child. I'm ok with that. I've had a wonderful upbringing, so it's a great trade off.OK I'm through jotting down, I think.

CANCER FREE-5 YEARS

This is supposed to be a milestone for cancer patients, so I'm claiming it. Just had my 5 yr. chest ct scan last week, and got the results today. I never felt like I had cancer. Didn't know I had it until after my surgery in recovery. They got it all and I had 6 wks. of radiation. Some may call it luck. I call it listening and obeying the spirit within me to quit putting off getting the chest ct scan. In the time the scan was done and the surgery (2 months) the tumor had attached itself to my heart lining. Ignoring the still small voice to get the scan done would have given the tumor permission to continue to grow and perhaps squeeze my heart to death. I know of a sweet lady in my church who died with hers b/c they could not find the problem. In her situation the thymus gland was BEHIND the heart and it wasn't showing up that it had a tumor. Thymoma is a rare tumor and still even more rare to be malignant.

Little did we know, while I was going thru this, colon cancer was making a home in my sister's body. She put off having a colonoscopy just like we ALL do. (I just had my 1st one done in September. And I should have had one when we found out about my sister) We get busy and can make all kinds of excuses to avoid THAT test. 6 months after MY ordeal, she honored me in a cookbook the bank employees made up to honor cancer patients-survivors and deaths. Had we known, she could have put herself in it also--b/c 6 weeks later she found she had cancer. She fought the good fight, but her body just couldn't deal with it all and about 18 months later cancer overtook her life. I sure do miss her. She wasn't in my everyday life, but on the special times, she was always there. For instance, I would be calling or emailing her about today. She'd be so happy for me. When I go home to my parents now, there's a void. That's when we always got together and did something--anything from garage sale shopping to fried ice cream at Cuco's to driving around and looking at Christmas lights with our kids crowded in the car. And by ourselves when the kids were too old to want to go.

Here's to Jean----she left a void in quite a few people besides me. My parents, my sister Debby, her children, her grandchildren, her husband, neices, nephews cousins, aunts and uncles, co-workers, many many friends and a host of fellow church members. One grandchild she didn't get to see, who's having her 2nd birthday right about now. Maybe she can see from where she is, or better still maybe she was present when that little soul left heaven to join her earthly body. Maybe she kissed her bye as she was leaving the Father's arms. Hmmm! I like that idea!!

Hold to what's dear, ya never know when you'll have to let go.

I give God All the Glory!

Makes my medicine go down easier

I've been in a email prayer group the last 44 days. Below was her message for today. I hope it helps you as it has me. Now my prayers are shifted ( as hard as it is to swallow) to praying for Obama as well as my country. GOD BLESS AMERICA

Dear Sisters and Brothers,

I wanted to send you a brief note to tell you a couple of things on my heart.

I do not for one second believe God has let us down. Of course, I am disappointed, but I refuse to be fearful. God is still God, and He loves us so much.

As the election drew nearer I began to see that if McCain/Palin won, we would find it harder to continue our prayers for our nation. Many would have believed our prayers were finished. But that would not have been the case at all.

It occurred to me that God might answer our long term prayers for healing by saying no to our short term request. Yes, we were praying earnestly for Senator McCain to win, but the greater calling was to pray for healing of our land.

A fellow prayer warrior wrote this earlier today, and I believe she is right:

"I do believe that the greatest prayer is still to be answered and I do believe God is at work in that area.....He is reviving His people.... We didn't need to get all that we asked for....we would have then relaxed and let McCain/ Palin take the lead. Instead, we are now forced to intercede and trust God for every piece of legislation and every policy and so on..."

We've all had our email boxes full of prayers and calls to prayer during this time. God has clearly started a prayer movement in our country. When He has done that before in history, revival soon followed.

Sisters and Brothers, our time on our knees continues, and let us continue like watchmen waiting for the morning, expectantly seeking and awaiting America's healing.

It has been such a blessing to pray with you these past 44 days.

The grace of the Lord Jesus be with you.

MY HOPE

Psalm 37:3,5-8
Trust in the Lord, and do good;
Dwell in the land, and feed on His faithfulness.

Commit your way to the Lord,
Trust also in Him, And He shall bring it to pass.
He shall bring forth your righteousness as the light,
And your justice as the noonday.

Rest in the Lord, and wait patiently for Him;
Do not fret because of him who prospers in his way,
Because of the man who brings wicked schemes to pass.
Cease from anger, and forsake wrath;
Do not fret - it only causes harm.

Psalm 31:24 Be of good courage, And He shall strengthen your heart, All you who hope in the Lord.

God is still in control ~ May God bring us as a nation back to
"In God We Trust