Rumor just a Rumor

A rumor that Kathy passed away last night is VERY UNTRUE! Although Kathy probably wishes it were true. I checked on her this morning from 8-9a.m. She had a full blown shower last night, hair washed again, extra pain meds during the night, beautiful new gown (thanks to Helen) and she was sleeping like a baby when I got there. The weekend doctor came in to examine her (bothering her,ha!) talking and woke her up. I hope she's able to go back to sleep. Roy and Helen stayed with her last night. Somehow, staff had it in their heads that we were going to be taking care of her; meaning potty times, showers. We did take care of potty times, but no way were we going to attempt showers with her. I wondered why she hadn't been given a shower yet. Pearl, Inez and I gave her a washcloth bathe and fresh gown Thursday. I assisted the aid Wednesday at Kathy's home with a shower and hair wash, but we thought it was going to be taken care of at Odyssey House. Just all a miscommunication and It's straightened out now.

Must go for now and meet Mary Ann, Jeremy, and Cassie at Tinseltown for a movie. Tune in again, maybe I will have added on to this blog.

Checked on her again on the way to movie. She was sleeping so good, she was snoring. Her legs have begun to swell and now are as puffy as they were at her party. Got the chair reclined a bit so the foot part would come out. That seemed to help. Later in the afternoon, they put her in the bed. In OUR minds, she would be so much more comfortable in bed, but she sat up and leaned over even worse than in the chair, so they put her back in the chair.

Tonight on the way home from my son's house, I checked on her again. She wasn't resting as well as before. More like she usually is. It might have been time for meds.

I have no idea about visitors, but by the sign in list at the front desk, it was the usual suspects, ha! plus Kathy Blakeman and Babbie and Van Van den akker. Adding Tim and Carolyn Berwick.

They have told us all along this week the time frame is DAYS! Sad but exciting for her.

IN HEAVEN

(over pa system)--"Attention! Kathleen Ruth Erwin Fuller will soon be entering the gates of Heaven.

Please be prepared to meet her with a Heavenly greeting! Decide among yourselves who might be the privileged ones to usher her home."

I can just hear the shuffling and chatter of many loved ones breathless with excitement. Imagine too, all the ones who are there because of Kathy's service to the Lord. There's going to be a humdinger of a homecoming when she arrives!! And just think..... I was blessed to have called her friend! She's so much more than a friend to me. I learned so much from rubbing shoulders with her. We laughed hard, cried hard, played hard and worked hard. She's the true picture of humility, compassion, kindness and generosity.

Father God, your timing is perfect, she's ready when you are!! Say when! Grant her and Roy a good night's rest. Roy is resting at home tonight. His sister Helen is staying with Kathy.

Me again labeling as I see it.

Pioneer Clubs with Kathy

When I think of all the years in Pioneer Clubs with Kathy, this song keeps popping up:

We are pioneers for Jesus, we're looking unto Him

We believe His Word and we trust the Lord

With a faith that will not dim

We are pioneers for Jesus, we're looking unto Him

So let the praises ring, and loud the voices sing

And GLORIFY HIS NAME!!

Friday Visit

The night went pretty good for Kathy. She looses her pillows or pushes them off, so I came up with a remedy for it. I looked around for something to tie them to the tray. There laid a fresh hospital gown....with ties!!! So I wrapped the pillows and tray together and tied them on. It lasted most of the night. I woke up at 5:30 and she had managed to push the whole mess to the end of the tray and it was all hanging down toward the floor. She woke around 6a.m. which is the time for her meds. She finally laid her head down again and slept about 11:30a.m. and slept a couple of hours. She is sitting in a chair still, and I'm sure she's tired of that position. She normally just fidgets constantly. I left around 3:30 p.m. to greet my grandson and his mother coming from the Dallas area for a weekend visit.

Visitors as best I know were Jim Jackson, Sherri Henry, Pat Cullum, Mary and Butch Fowler, Jane Hayes, Carolyn McMillan, Catherine Davis, Katie Schneider and Joann Clair. Now when I say visitors, I'm not referring to the family, because Pearl, Roy, Kristi, Karla and grandkids, her brothers are a given. Her oldest brother Ralph and wife Erma arrived today for the weekend. Her youngest brother, Kenneth is still here. Helen, Roy's other sister arrives tonight also. Erma is set to stay the night but so is Helen. They can tug it out. HA! Debby Carter came last night. I forgot to mention her.

Father God, I know your timing is perfect so I pray your timing is soon. I hate for her to suffer like this and I know it can only get worse. If it's not time yet, please give her and Roy another good night's rest. In Jesus name and in the power of the blood that he shed on the cross for Kathy. Amen. p.s. Thank you so much for allowing me to sit at her feet for so many years. She is such a good friend.

It's me labeling as I see it. :(

Thursday Visit

Just a quick note, I'll write more later. Kathy has passed the stage of wanting to be woken up when you come visit. Visit but let her sleep if she's asleep. Sleep =no pain. This is moving faster everyday. Later.....

Well, live and learn . Wish there was hospice 101 we could take. When I got there Kathy was just waking up as was Roy and Pearl. It was time for more pain liquid meds, but she put up a little fuss with it so this daytime nurse, instead of fighting her, had the techs come put the little butterfly needle in with a tiny tube on the end to inject meds. One stick right?? Well, we thought yeah. And it was, but the meds going in sting or burn for a few seconds. Which of course hurts. She is in a recliner type chair with a tray over it, which suits her great, since she wants to sit. Last night and this morning she slept on 2 pillows on top of the tray. She had a lot of visitors today, and she did recognize them all. The problem with this is we tend to visit with one another. I went out to the outer waiting area when the room was full, but I am guilty of visiting too. (talking) When the nurse came in to check on her about 4:30 p.m. I mentioned she had been restless this afternoon. She gave some reply. I said "I want to be honest, is talking among one another keeping her from resting?" DUH!!! She said and I quote "you said it, I didn't. Yes mentally she wants to engage in the conversation, hence not resting" I didn't think about that, but I did think about the pain she's in and noise seeming aggravating. She talked of the "ministry of presence" letting her know you're there but being quite. And keep it one or maybe two (if you can resist carrying on a conversation) people in the room at a long period of time.

When I asked this question, Kathy sat straight up and opened her eyes!! Nurse asked her if the talking was too much and Kathy SMILED really big. BLESS HER PEA_PICKING HEART!! If that didn't tell all!! I hugged her and apologized for my part of talking.

Visitors were Jim Jackson, Sherri Henry, Kenneth Erwin, Mary Fowler, Jeff and Alecia Russell, Gerrie Schaefer, Tim Berwick, Inez Staton, Stacey, and I'll probably add more after tonight.

I'm off to spend the night with her. Father God, give her good rest tonight and Roy too.

I'm ashamed to admit all this, but it's the truth and the truth hurts sometimes! Unfortunately, the one it hurt was Kathy. Now don't get me wrong, the talk was soft for the most part with EVERYONE, but still annoying.

This is me labeling it as I see it.

Wednesday Visit! Hospice Home to Hospice House

Whew!!! Today was a humdinger!! I bought another bell for the bed then met Betty LaVergne at south loop for her to follow me to Kathy's. We get there and the nurses were already there talking to Kristi in the kitchen while Betty visited with Roy and Kathy. Interesting things we learned today. Kathy continued her "misbehaving" (joking people!) thru the night, pulling the oxygen out and trying to get out of bed. We learned this was a sign of agitation and agitation was a sign of pain (or discomfort as Kathy would have it). Also there was a med in the "comfort pack" that was for one thing but also had a dual purpose which is to help her lucidness (if that's a word). Also heart rate or respiration being elevated is a sign of pain. Who knew?? They never told us these things, but I guess sometimes things happen and you deal with it. The aid came and gave her a bath, which was not very much fun for Kathy. She had wanted her hair washed but had no idea she was going to be drenched. And because she holds her head down, of course the water went --where??? We gave her a towel, but it only helped for a split second. I'm sorry Kathy, but now you feel better right?? right?? "yeah" in a soft voice. It's a task now to get her to move her feet even just to stand and turn a little to sit. Her sense of humor remains. At some point today, I was giving her her meds and she looked at me from the side with one eye and jerked her oxygen out and laughed. I put it back, she took it out with the same look and laughed. This went on about 4 times. I think it has something to do with Nurse Rachett!!! By afternoon, we couldn't coax her to take her meds or even drink anything. Her face has been itchy and we checked to see if she could take something for it and we could not get her to take it. So we called the nurse and she came out and our option was to take her to Odyssey House and keep her a couple of days to figure out what formula of meds would work for her. She could come back home then with the new formula to continue to keep her comfortable. This was a tough decision for Roy to make but with much discussion he was convinced this was the best solution for Kathy and that's what counted. To get her comfortable is the whole goal of hospice and they will do everything they can to reach that goal.

So about 6p.m. the ambulance picked her up to transport her to Odyssey House. Inez Staton rodewith her and her sister-in-law Pearl followed in her car. I followed shortly afterwards. Roy ate dinner and was going to spend the first night with her. The update I got from others there after me was she to be given something under the skin to give meds thru, but they didn't call it a picc line or an IV, so I won't know until morning.

Visitors today were Barbara Williams, Peggy Bowersox, Shirley Royal, Betty LaVergne, Inez Staton, Margaret O'Brian, Dianna Shinn, Sam and Carolyn Whigham, Mark Fuller, Mary Ann Fuller, Jim Jackson, Sherri Henry, Pearl. Surely left someone out. Let me know! Oh! also Bill Downs, Jim Jackson and Sherri Henry mowed and cleaned up back yard a bit. Kudos!!!!

I absolutely hate to see her hang her head in sleep. She says it feels good to massage her neck and shoulders, so I try to do that often, even holding her head in my hand while she sleeps.

Father God, you are who we rest in. Give Roy comfort and peace tonight. And give them both a good night's sleep. your timing is perfect and we surrender to you will.

This is me labeling as I see it.

Tuesday Visit

This morning on the way out to Kathy's I stopped by Tractor Supply and bought a small LOUD bell for Kathy to ring when she needs help in any way. 2/3 of the way out, I realized I left my cell phone at home when I went to call their house and warn them I was coming. Boy did I feel naked without it. After arriving and having coffee with Roy, we decided we needed another bell and tie the bells to either side of the bed to alert us she was trying to get up from bed by herself. Twice Roy was awakened by her grunting trying to get up, sitting on the edge of the bed. (once at 3a.m. and once at 6a.m.) Assessment of the situation tells us she may not be lucid enough to ring the bell for help. that she just tries by herself. She doesn't move much in bed, so hopefully there won't be false alarms. Any other ideas are much appreciated.

Let's see visitors: niece Stacey, childhood friend Joann Clair, neighbor friend Sheryl Knight, friends-Carolyn and Bill Downs, John and Mary Schubert, Barby Murdock, Dianna Shinn, Ves and Chadda Caperton, nieces Tricia and Alex. I'm sure I left someone out, let me know, I'll add them.

Jeff Cashner came today to discuss arrangements. SHE WANTS VISITORS! Wake her, if she's asleep. She says she'll have plenty of time for sleep later. :)

We sang a few songs with her (Barby and me). I could hear her humming them. She wanted me to sing I Can Only Imagine, but I could only sing the chorus. My mind went senior for a minute, couldn't remember the verses. Came home and printed the words out to sing to her tomorrow.

She was misbehaving a little tonight. She refused to put the oxygen back on after Roy changed the nose piece. No amount of coaxing was working on her for about 30 minutes and then finally Kayli (the 13 yr.old granddaughter) just said "here let me put this back on for you" WHA_LA!!!

They had called me to maybe help convince her, but by the time I got there, Kayli had already done her magic! :) I stayed a little while. We got her to sit in the recliner sitting on this back massager thing-a-ma-gig and it felt good to her. I told her I would see her in the morning, and she'd better behave or they would call Nurse Rachett out again! joke, joke, people!!! She still has her sense of humor. She said she was being-having!!!

Monday Visit

Today was not a good day, for me anyway!! Kristi had given her bath and she was sitting in her wheelchair talking to Inez Staton. Well, actually she was just sitting there, snoozing off and on. Sure looked uncomfortable to me. Barb Garnett came with me. We both tried to talk her into moving to the bed, but she wouldn't have it. This is the first day she has not been lucid. She has always been with us mentally, even if she couldn't breathe good. Last night Roy woke up to her sitting on the bedside potty. He asked her how she got there. She said "Barbara and Beverly helped me". That did not happen!! Was she dreaming?? Was it angels helping when they saw her possibly injuring herself? It's a mystery!! All during our stay, she was in and out of reality. From what we've been told and read, Melanoma is fierce once it comes back. It's like popcorn, popping up everywhere. One ex-ray may not show, but the next ex-ray will show it popping up in a new place. And it's not uncommon for it to go to the brain, which would explain the funny talk.

Her friend Sylvia from grade school came with her husband, brought her flowers. Her niece Lorrie and her girls came also. Joann came after I left, I missed her.

Today is Steven's birthday and Kristi is cooking chicken alfredo for the family as requested by the birthday boy. Oh, and Mississippi Mud cake. Yummy to my tummy!!! They better save me some!! Kristi called me last night to see if the meals could start the next night.

There was questions about the Lyrica meds Kathy was taken and was told the Lyrica could sedate more than the morphine. The morphine can be given every hour if needed, so they will try that instead of the Lyrica. It's really a mute cause, at this point.

She still wants visitors and wants us to wake her up when they come. She apologizes for falling asleep on us in mid-sentence. Her pat answer is "I'm alright" or "it's ok" or "I'm sorry". Today, with a smile, she told me I was being mean when I reminded her to breathe in!! I bumped her chair when moving behind her and she asked me if I was trying to dump her out. I told her, she'd know if I was trying that. So she's still got her sense of humor. She does not want to waste her time left sleeping, so wake her up, people!

Father God, give her good rest tonight, and if she should try getting up by herself, send Barbara and Beverly over to help her again. I'm taking a bell over tonight, if they don't find one.